My Goodbye Email to My Coworkers

 

My most important email I have ever sent is below.  It’s been a little over 4 months since my last day worked and I moved to a new state, so I thought I’d share my farewell email that I sent to my coworkers.  For the most part, early retirement has been great.  The most difficult obstacle has been in dealing with my parents.  They worry that I’m not working and constantly ask when I will start a family, both fun conversation (so taking applications from cute and chill ladies out there 🙂  ) Many liked my farewell email, as it matches my twisted sense of humor and is full of sarcasm.  I have only changed my social media and contact info and removed the name of the company.  This went out to about 30 something people that I liked that worked there out of 500 employees (not a single manager included because they sucked).  Sound off below, funny, stupid, have you dreamed of your farewell email and 2 weeks notice letter?

So here goes, enjoy:

 

Subject: Peace Out to My Peeps

Greetings,

I’m not really good at this touchy feely stuff (I’m also sometimes a bit of a slacker), so I am just using a template that I found on the world wide web and I’ll do this in a sort of “Mad Libs” style sort of way.

The instructions will follow, in case you need it one day.  My answers are in BLUE below.  If I forgot anyone…whelp.

PS.  Please open the attached video after you read the whole email.  It will have more dramatic effect (volume turned up).

untitled

Fellow <insert catchy nickname for your team> Life Partners™ (do we still even use that on our site),

It’s with <a heavy heart, a gentle sad face, a knowing glance> that I must share with you my decision to leave retire from a horribly run company<insert name of company>. This was <obviously, clearly, apparently> a very difficult decision to make.

It’s hard to believe that <insert how long you worked there> 13.5 years ago, I was the <insert your first position at the company> Client Outreach Specialist I. From that time, until when I was <insert next position> Client Outreach Specialist I, and all the way to my current role as <insert current position> Personal Financial Advisor I (wait, you can also use Client Outreach Specialist I here as well, same thing), I have grown so much. Thank you for teaching and inspiring me, and allowing me to do the same for you.

I am headed off to explore my next chapter <insert vague but exciting thing you’ll be doing.> of unlocking the left brain.

I’m excited about my future there, while I continue to be excited about all the things you’ll continue to accomplish here (except for you <insert name of person everyone makes fun of> Doug White), you never finish anything! (Just kidding bro, it was part of the template)

If I could leave you all with just one thought, remember

<insert sage advice>. 

FV

If you ever want to get in touch, my contact info is below. This isn’t goodbye, our paths will cross again.

If you made it this far and you received this email, it’s probably because I either:

a)   enjoyed working with you

b)   enjoyed your witty banter

c)   hanging out with you was fun

d)   or you are just a pretty cool cat

I will be farming outside of Tucson, playing with Charcoal the Bassett Hound, doing a lot of biking, watching “The Price is Right” weekdays at 10am, and working on algorithms.

Virtual Hug,

<insert your name> Marc

<contact info>        m_emailaddress@email.com

214-abc-1234

IG: BamfMoney

FB: somewhere on there (https://www.facebook.com/BamfMoney/)

FYI:  http://thecooperreview.com/a-proven-formula-for-writing-goodbye-email/ (For future reference).


This communication and any attached files may contain information that is confidential or privileged. If this communication has been received in error, please delete or destroy it immediately. Please go to
www.worstcompanyever.org/EmailDisclaimers for important information and further disclaimers pertaining to this transmission.

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Readers Comments (111)

    • No, thank you. You have some very funny stuff on your site. I spent many hours checking it out at work.

      • Haha very nice! Definitely the way to go out with a laugh!

        • Thanks. It was a pretty crazy week building up to it. It was also one of the best feelings exiting the building and waking up the next day not having to deal with traffic, but instead drink coffee and watch “The Price is Right”

  1. Ahaa, its fastidious conversation about this
    post here at this web site, I have read all that, so now me
    also commenting at this place.

  2. I like it. It says nothing, but conveys many things. Nothing that anyone can reasonably get loud about. Well done!

    • Thanks for dropping by.
      I saw your post about your employer screwing up on sending your W-2, that sucks. I am worried about that happening to me next year. HR can be real incompetent.

  3. It’s the best time to make a few plans for the future and it’s time to be
    happy. I have learn this post and if I may just I want to counsel
    you some attention-grabbing issues or advice. Maybe you could write next
    articles regarding this article. I want to learn even more things about it!

  4. Hello! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading this post reminds
    me of my old room mate! He always kept chatting about this.
    I will forward this article to him. Fairly
    certain he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!

    • Hi Rene. Thanks for stopping by. I was the same as your roomie. I told people for years I was going to retire early. I think only about 3 people believed me. When I left work, the most common response was “Wow, you’re doing it. I thought you were kidding for all these years”. It can be done.

  5. Way cool! Some very valid points! I appreciate you writing this write-up and the rest of the website is
    extremely good.

  6. I’ll immediately grasp your rss as I can’t find your
    e-mail subscription hyperlink or e-newsletter service. Do you have any?
    Please allow me understand in order that I could subscribe.
    Thanks.

    • Hi, I don’t have a newsletter. Feel free to follow me on twitter @bamfmoney for the latest articles.
      Thanks for checking out my site.

  7. Myfavoritejew June 4, 2016 @ 2:02 am

    Miss you buddy! The email was pure gold. Enjoyed the 3 years as cube mates.

    • Hey Bro, I won’t even bother to edit the screen name because it’s true. I couldn’t remember if I sent this to you or not. Enjoyed working with you, hope they treat you better than I was treated.
      BAMF
      P.S. stop buying CRK, TWTR, and GPRO is not getting bought out by APPL. Remember everyone needs cigarettes, toilet paper, and bleach.

  8. First off I want to say superb blog! I had a quick question which I’d like to ask if you do not mind.
    I was curious to know how you center yourself and clear
    your head prior to writing. I have had a difficult
    time clearing my mind in getting my ideas out there.
    I do take pleasure in writing however it just seems like the first 10 to 15 minutes are generally lost simply just trying to
    figure out how to begin. Any suggestions or tips?
    Thank you!

    • Hi Rene,
      I just write down a note whenever an idea comes to mind so I don’t forget and go from there.
      Unfortunately I don’t have any tips to make the first 10 minutes any easier, as I am constantly changing and updating things.
      You just need to power through the post, just to get the idea out there. It doesn’t have to be perfect, just clear enough for a reader to understand the message.
      Cheers,
      BAMF

  9. Howdy! Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group?
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  10. Thank’s great post.

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  12. Haha.. you’re too much, bro. This was great!

    • Thanks for dropping by J$. I had been planning this email for a while. I was torn on the video between “you complete me” and the intro “who’s with me”. Being that I was known as a hugger around the office, “you complete me” won out.

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